Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
