In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
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