Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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