He asked me if I "almost moaned"
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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