So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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