I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
