Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
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