what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
