got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
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