I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
