Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
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