You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
The adults are the big ones right?
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize