can we get nightvision for the apartment?
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
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