Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
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