i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
