Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Randomize
