My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
Randomize
