He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Randomize
