Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
