The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize
