i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
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