Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
