Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
