he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
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