I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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