Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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