Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
