Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Randomize
