hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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