Your tits are I can't wait for
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
