Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Randomize