Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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