I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
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