We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Randomize
