# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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