I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
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