5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
