ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
