id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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