i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
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