you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
