does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
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