no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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