wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
Michael Bay diarrhea
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Randomize
