it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Randomize
