So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
