I don't usually arrange sex via text message
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize