Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
