Whod you bang
When I'm drunk i like to pretend my penis is zeus and instead of peeing i'm throwing lightning bolts into the toilet...it helps me focus.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
