If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
he puts the penis in happiness.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
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