And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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