I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
Your penis caused this!
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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